FATE sounds fatalistic, doesn’t it?
DESTINY sounds like we humans may have some control over what happens.
.
Have you ever felt like everything you tried was boomed? As if you have a black cloud hanging over your head?
I have. It’s a terrible feeling. It sucks to feel like your efforts are squashed. And it sucks even worse when it happens year after year. Event after event.
I figure we’ve all had times when we screamed out loud in frustration because we felt thwarted despite being intelligent, prepared, efficient, hard working … and all the things that should mean success.
Regular setbacks can make a person want to quit.
But you can’t quit.
Life is worth living and whatever it is that you are trying to bring to life – a dance or skate dress, a new business, a new home, improving your fitness level, or feeling sane in a world that sometimes seems insane – every ounce of your effort is worth it.
Since March 2014 when I began filming and creating my signature programs: the Latin & Skate Dance Dressmaker School and the Ballroom Dressmaker School, plus through all the years of keeping the business going mostly by myself, I have had dozens of insane setbacks that tried to stop me.
Before I knew how harmful these types of thoughts can be, I used to ask myself and the All That Is,
“How can I, who is smart, dedicated, creative, resourceful and doing such good work for myself and others have my dreams trampled on time and again?
Am I doomed? Is my life and everything I want to do/be/have always going to be this difficult to achieve?”
.
Here’s an example: 2016 is my Sew Like A Pro™ 10th anniversary. I have several events planned to celebrate.
My first live event of the year was the START TO FINISH DRESS SUCCESS Masterclass.
Everything fell into place quickly. Three students volunteered to share a dress they made. The promotional artwork looked great. I was excited about the class because I love teaching live, and because I love showcasing dresses my students made. (These DRESS SUCCESS classes make my heart sing.)
I sent out the first email to over 2,900 people on my email list. I expected the usual daily sign-ups, confident 100 or so would participate in the class.
After six days of marketing for a FREE or DONATION class, only 17 people had enrolled – half of which were sewing school students who had ongoing access to the Dress Success masterclass recordings anyway so they didn’t need to register to attend!
This was no coincidence. I had experienced this phenomena many times before. One event was a success. The next event was a forced failure. It had become a horrible pattern I couldn’t seem to prevent.
For this particular event, DRESS SUCCESS #1 in December was a success. When DRESS SUCCESS #2 a few months later had negative momentum, I knew I had not been able to overcome the pattern. This was anti-success, anti-goodness at its finest, or rather at its worst.
Oh, I was mad, and grieving for another dream that had been squashed.
So I canceled my first Sew Like A Pro™ event in ten years because I could not overcome the negative momentum in time. I canceled so I could protect the integrity of my school and all of my amazing students.
But I’m not quitting my life, my dreams, or Sew Like A Pro™. I’m waiting as patiently as I can for a better time. Meanwhile, I continue doing “the work” as Byron Katie calls it so that some day soon I will “win” all my dreams into life.
Love and Goodness (call it God or Source if you prefer) wants us all to thrive and succeed so I know I will win eventually.
On the bright side…
When there are so many anti-love energies determined to stop me from succeeding, I know I’ve got a mighty Good thing in myself, my business, and my entire Sew Like A Pro™ community.
Thank YOU for being part of it all.
So which it is: FATE or DESTINY?
What stops me – and so many other women – from thriving, from feeling good, from being the comfortable, successful women we know we can and should be?
I reminded myself FATE sounds fatalistic. DESTINY sounds like I have some control over what happens to me and my life. Part of fighting The Good Fight is that I choose to feel empowered. So how could I change this situation, if only in my mind so I felt better about it?
I took a bunch of deep breaths.
I cried in frustration.
I screamed and cursed at everything and everyone I cannot see with my human eyes.
… and I let it go. There is no wise choice except to let all the garbage feelings go.
I let the bulk of the anger and frustration go in about thirty minutes. The greiving and sadness for what I deemed a loss took me a couple days until I had a Group Coaching event with my dressmaker school students.
You can say something as simple “let it go” dozens of times while using your hands to send the energies over your head and down your back, letting them literally roll off your back into the past.
Even if you don’t know (or don’t want to admit) the exact emotions, say “release emotions” as many times as it takes until your body or your mind relaxes.
Then say something to spur you forward. Say it as many times as it takes for you to breathe easier, for you to have hope.
Here is one example:
.
It is my right to have a magnificent life.
I choose to never ever be doomed by someone else’s fate.
I choose for my destiny to be one of love, joy and prosperity.
.
.
Together, we can create a better world.
We can choose to fight the good fight, by whatever means is right for us as individuals.
For me, I run the world’s most comprehensive, interactive, community-based sewing school EVER. I feel empowered helping you feel more confident in who you are and how you look in real life or on the dance floor/skate rink.
I think that’s enough.
I believe I am enough.
I believe you are enough.
I believe what I offer via Sew Like A Pro™ is an amazing way to help myself and to serve the world using my natural strengths and talents.
Individually, we can choose our destiny instead of being swallowed, chewed and spit out by “fate”.
One drop of hope at a time. One smile at a time. One tingle of love at a time.
We can do it.
We can all thrive and succeed with ease and grace, in comfort and in style. (That’s one of my new favorite phrases 🙂
Here’s to overcoming fate and creating a delicious destiny!
Teresa Sigmon
creator of all things Sew Like A Pro™ for dancers and skaters, and Goodness For You.
Get weekly GOODNESS FOR YOU inspiration via email.
P.S. Feel free to share a story of how you overcame a setback. Goodness is always a story worth being told.
.
.